The counselling relationship is one of the most important aspects of therapy

The idea of having a counselling session and talking for 50 minutes to a relative stranger can be a scary prospect. It’s not always easy to express yourself openly, especially if you are not used to talking about your feelings. However, in the counselling environment, people often find it easier to talk to a professional who doesn’t know them, who doesn’t judge them and who doesn’t give biased advice. You are at the centre of the counselling relationship and you are valued as a person, exactly as you are.

A successful counselling relationship enables you to work through whatever problem you’re having using mutual trust, listening/communication skills and challenging you when necessary in an authentic, non-threatening way.

As the relationship is so important to therapy as a whole, you should take the time to find the right counsellor for you and don’t necessarily settle for the first counsellor that you meet. If you feel safe and click with them, then great, but if you’re unsure, then it’s best to explore other options.

After a consultation or assessment with a counsellor you should have a good idea of what they are like. If you’re happy to go ahead, it’s then important to monitor and keep checking that you can continue to work with them.

 If the counselling relationship isn’t beneficial for you at any point, then discuss it with the counsellor. This isn’t a failure on your part; you’re simply acknowledging that somebody isn’t the right fit for you. We don’t click with everybody that we meet and counselling is no exception.